I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
