hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize
