You kept calling me your small dog last night.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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