You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
