I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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