kristin has been a bad kristin
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
