one might say we're banned from that church
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
