I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize