i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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