and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize