road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
