Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize