My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
