i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
