unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I look excited, but its just a facade.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
