I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
