I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
