You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
