Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
