Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
My liver just had a heart attack.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
