it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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