Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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