well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
