I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Randomize
