We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize