Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
