That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
