why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
