It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
