erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Can I color on your dick again?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
