By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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