I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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