Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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