do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
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