remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize