like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
