sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
