my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
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