pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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