What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
