Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
My penis needs a shock collar
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
as a side note pls kill me
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
