i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize
