Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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