so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
The air taste purple.
Randomize
