We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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