She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
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