One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize