fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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