I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
