Have you finally orgasmed yet?
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
