I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
